In today’s society, we have a lot more choices for love. Whether it be that we are no longer pressured to marry the first person we like and immediately start having children or because our options have increased due to social networking.
As great as these options may seem, it may hold us back due to the idea that there might be someone better. The issue is, there will always be someone more attractive or funnier, but that doesn’t mean that they will suit your needs better than your current partner.
Because of these choices, single people and couples are more afraid of commitment. Just because you are dating someone doesn’t mean you can’t be afraid of commitment.
Keep on reading and we will teach you the top 10 signs of commitment issues and how to overcome these fears.
1. You Keep Your Dating App Active
19% of people meet their partners through dating apps and social media, while 17% meet through their friends. This means that dating apps are the most common way to meet a significant partner.
While dating apps are beneficial to meet people, what do you do when you’ve met someone you like? Do you keep your options open in case it doesn’t work out or do you deactivate your account for the moment?
While it wouldn’t be advisable to delete your account after just one date, having an open and active account after a month or so means you have a commitment-phobia unless you both have discussed to see other people.
Even if you have an account just to see what other options there are and you don’t message anyone or meet up with them, you are still actively keeping your options open to leave the relationship. By deactivating your account, you are giving your partner your full attention.
2. You Pick the Wrong Partner
Picking the wrong partner means that you actively date a person that has either told you that they don’t want to settle down or you date someone that you know won’t be a life-long partner. These relationships are often unhealthy.
By overlooking personality differences or just dating someone because you find them attractive, you are ensuring that the relationship doesn’t work out. While looks do matter, so does compatibility.
Next time you go on a date or swipe right on a potential suitor, ask what they are looking for, a relationship or a casual date?
3. You Think Poorly of Your Married Friends
This doesn’t mean that you think your married friends are awful people, this just means that you think they either settled or got married too early.
For example, many people who are scared of commitment often view their married friends are someone who ‘left the party’ too soon. This means, they had other options for a moment of fun, but they decided to settle down instead.
4. You Can’t Commit to Anything
Your fear of commitment symptoms don’t only affect your dating life, it may also affect your job or the idea of moving somewhere else.
If you have an amazing job offer across the world, you may entertain the concept of taking it, but you won’t actually do it due to your commitment issues. You may think about it every day, but you will never actually make the move.
If you have an option to move or to try something completely different, do it! Life is full of surprises and you just have to follow where it takes you.
5. You Are More Interested in Hooking up
Just to clarify, there is nothing wrong with hooking up and exploring your single life. However, when years pass by and you’re doing the same thing, you might have commitment issues.
While it may be easy to read this and think “I don’t have commitment issues, I just like to have fun” ask yourself if that is true. Often times we make excuses for ourselves because it is easier to handle than the truth.
If you find the idea of grabbing breakfast with the person you just slept with horrible, it’s time to dig deeper as to why.
6. Your Friends/Family Bring up Your Dating Life
Friends and family often support us wholeheartedly, but if you notice the people around you questioning your dating life or probing as to why your never dating, it’s because they’ve noticed your commitment issues.
If you never bring a significant other to a family event or around the holidays, it might be because you are scared of commitment.
While you don’t want to introduce your partner to your family as soon as you meet, if it’s been months of dating and still there has been no introduction, you’re afraid.
7. You Always End the Relationship
While some relationships run their course, some end with no warning signs. If you end your relationships due to small issues or fights, you may be using that as an excuse to leave.
While relationships are definitely not easy, escaping from your partner with any chance you get is a red flag. By working on a relationship and fixing the issues instead of running from them, you will be actively overcoming a fear of commitment.
8. You Are Critical of Others
Not every person you go on a date with will be your match made in heaven. However, if you meet someone you like but immediately blow them off for unimportant reasons, you may have a commitment-phobia.
Everyone has flaws, including you, and this means that overlooking small details are vital to have a successful relationship.
If you go on a date and you tell your friends you won’t be seeing the person again due to something minor such as “he didn’t make me laugh enough” then you are making excuses. There is a difference between settling and nitpicking.
9. You Won’t Make Sacrifices
For any relationship to work, both partners must sacrifice something every once in a while.
This does not mean that you have to shed your morals or do things that make you uncomfortable, this means making a compromise so that you and your partner are both content. If you are constantly shutting down your partner’s ideas, you may not be fully committed.
10. You Make Excuses
If you tell yourself that you don’t have time to date yet you can spend all Saturday afternoon binging your favorite show, you are making excuses.
While life may be busy and hectic every once in a while, it doesn’t mean that you will never have time to date. Dating doesn’t have to be a full-blown relationship, it could be going out on one date to test the waters.
Remember, dates do not have to be time-consuming, you can even go for a coffee date during your lunch hour.
Are You Afraid of Commitment?
Well, if you stayed around this entire article, then the answer is probably yes.
This doesn’t mean that you should just accept your fears and never fully commit, it just means you have to work a little harder to make your relationships last. Like we stated previously, we are human and we all have flaws, you just happen to be afraid of commitment.
If you would like to would like to reconnect with your partner, click here!